Going back
by masked and anonymous
Summary: What if Gunther was an alien sent from a distant galaxy to Earth on a mission?
1. And so it goes

_Author's note_

_Hey again, this is just another random thing I thought up when I was flicking through a flash Gordon comic. Basically, Gunther is an alien sent from a distant planet (Netuupo) to Earth and well, you'll have to read it to find out more :) _

_I still don't own friends, dammit Janet._

**And so it goes…**

Gunther looked at the calendar carefully positioned against the wall_. Today was the day_. He had it all planned out and nobody was going to ruin it for him. He'd spent too long on this miserable little planet and he had to get out. He went over his plan in his head, being from Netuupo (in the galaxy of X010-40), he had an extremely good memory he could remember almost anything he'd ever seen, read or been told. His plan was pretty straight forwards anyway. He had succeeded in his mission so all he had to do was get home to his beloved planet.

He put away his sheets in a cupboard. The coffee house was his home. He had flown it all the way from Netuupo and now was going to fly back in it. The higher council of Netuupo knew it was a risk. Nearly the whole of New York could potentially see the coffee house, or ship, as it took off but it was a risk they were willing to take. They had found humans to be not the cleverest of creatures. Even if they did happen to see the ship taking off, would they really suspect an alien war was coming?

Gunther had decided he would take home 4 humans home with him. 2 as a gift to his mother, the queen of Netuupo, and 2 for his own use. He had decided who to take a long time ago when he first arrived, in the year the humans called 1994. That group, well, some of them anyway. The ones who were always there, with the strange names. Well, all Earth names were strange to him.

There were 6 of them. He had decided he would keep Rachel and Chandler for himself. He would force Rachel to marry him- Chandler wouldn't be a threat really- and he would take Ross and Phoebe to his mother, she always liked Earth music. As for Ross, Gunther knew the queen would work him very hard. Good. It would be his punishment for keeping Rachel from him all these year. As for the other two, he'd have to kill them. He couldn't have them telling the police or FBI about what they were going to see. No, they'd have to go. He had no use for them.

He checked the fuel supply before firing up the cappuccino machine. The morning dragged, he didnt want to hang around too long unnecessarily. When were they going to get there? He was going to take off as soon as they were there, well, he would have to get rid of the other people first though.

Then, at 12 o'clock precisely, there they were. Bingo.

_Foot note_

_Sorry it was a bit short, next chapter should be longer, thanks for reading x_


	2. I'm going home

_Author's note_

_Hello :) Here's the next chapter for you to (hopefully) enjoy. I don't know when I'll be able to update next as I'm sleeping at my friend's house tonight (well, I say sleeping but I mean staying up all night watching the scream films and rocky horror.) so I may be able to update Saturday as I'll be dead on Friday aha._

_I still don't own friend but my DVD of 'it came from out of space' has come so I'm happy :)  
_

**I'm going home**

Gunther watched them as they entered the coffee house and sat where they always did on the couch. He would let them have a cup of coffee first maybe, then take them. The truth was, he was nervous and this wasn't a good time for nerves. He couldn't mess this up.  
Rachel walked over to order the gang's drinks.

"Hey Gunther, 4 coffees a lemonade and an iced tea please."

"Sure." He said, resisting the urge to lean over and kiss her_. Leave it_ he told himself, _you can kiss her all you want once you're back home. _

He quickly made the drinks and handed them to Rachel then he went to check on the control panel. It seemed to be alright, it had become slightly damaged due to him crash landing when he first arrived but he'd worked to rebuild it. The fuel supply was full as well which was good; it took almost a full tank to get back home to Netuupo.

By this time, quite a few people were leaving. _Good_ Gunther thought, now it would be easier to get the gang on their own. He was growing impatient but at the same time was nervous, he had gas that would knock them out for a few hours but he wasn't planning on using that as he wasn't fully immune to it himself. No, it was only a precaution. He looked over towards Rachel and fell into a daydream about their life together on Netuupo. They could lie about all day and do whatever they wanted whilst Ross and Chandler would wait on them and Phoebe would play her guitar for the old queen. It would be perfect he thought.

By this time, the coffee house was virtually empty except for the gang and a group of hipsters at the back but soon they packed up to leave. Right Gunther thought time to move. He started up the engine and soon the coffee house so shaking. The gang looked surprised, except for Ross who had gone to the restroom. Gunther stepped into a cupboard and changes into his 'uniform' which consisted of a silver tunic, black leggings and boots and a belt. As he stepped out the gang (minus Ross) looked at him.

"Nice outfit." Joey smiled. Gunther didn't reply, instead he walked over to the counter and pulled a few levers.

"What's going on? Earthquake?" Ross asked as he came out of the restroom. Then he saw his friends looking worried.

"I don't know but check out Gunther." Joey said pointing towards the counter.

"Huh. Fancy dress party?" He asked

"Of sorts." Gunther replied.

When everything was ready for take-off, he reached into a drawer and pulled out his antimatter laser. Extremely dangerous, one blast would kill a human. It would take two to kill an alien and maybe more if they were around antimatter often.

Gunther turned round to face the gang.

"Right. It's time." He said, walking over to them. He picked out the two he would kill, first aiming the gun at Joey.

"Hey, what is that?" Joey asked.

"An antimatter gun." Gunther replied with a wicked grin on his face.

"What! That will kill us. Why?" Ross asked.

"Not all of you. I'm taking four of you with me."

"With you where?" Monica asked. None of them could quite believe what was happening.

"Not you. But I'm taking the rest of your friends back to my planet of Netuupo."

They all exchanged worried glances. Suddenly, Gunther noticed two people walking towards the coffee house so quickly he ran to the counter and flicked the switch, within seconds they were airborne and flying over New York. He'd have to kill them later. Then he could throw their bodies into space. _Perfect_ he thought.

_Footnote_

_So long, farewell etc. hope you enjoyed and thanks for reading, over and out x_


	3. Eve of destruction

_Author's note_

_Hi, I'm very sorry I haven't updated for quite a while. Well, first thing's first I guess. I hope you all had a good first week back at school (well, people who live in the UK/have gone back to school that is). I possibly had the worst half week ever but we'll see how it goes… I haven't updated because I've been sort of busy with school work (I know, I've only been back like 3 days) and well, I kind of got into a little trouble at school and home and I don't really know what's going to happen over the next few weeks, it's all a bit crap at the moment but I'll update when I can :)_

_I don't own Friends._

**Eve of destruction**

As soon as they were well above New York, Gunther advanced towards them, once again with his antimatter laser. The gang were all huddled together by the store cupboard. Ever since they learnt of Gunther's intentions to only let some of them live, they decided it would be better to stick together, _safety in numbers. _

"Move!" Gunther hissed at Chandler who was on the outside of the group. "I have a use for you. Wouldn't want you to get killed."

"A use? W…what are you talking about?" Chandler asked.

"Ah, I feel you will be of great use on Netuupo, my home planet, as a general servant. Or even an entertainer once in a while."

"What? No! I live here." He protested.

"Oh don't worry though." Gunther said mockingly, "Your friends will be there too. Well, most of them anyway." He aimed the laser at Monica who was crouched just behind Chandler.

"Leave her alone!" Chandler shouted, moving in the line of the laser.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you."

Nobody had noticed Phoebe moving to the outside of the group. Yelling, she jumped on Gunther, knocking the laser out of his hand. Chandler used the distraction to run with Monica to the restrooms. Joey followed them but the others stayed where they were, too scared to move.

"Chandler I'm scared." Joey said

"Ok, we'll be ok. This will all work out somehow."

"He wants to kill me and Mon!" Joey protested as they went inside the men's restroom and locked the door.

"Do you really think I'd let him kill you two?"

Meanwhile, Phoebe had only knocked Gunther out for a few minutes. When he woke up, he reached for the laser but found it had gone.

"Where's my laser?" He demanded. Phoebe, Rachel and Ross just looked at each other; Phoebe had hidden it in the store cupboard under some old broken chairs.

"Never mind." Gunther snapped, "I don't need it anyway."

Stumbling, he walked towards the counter and found his little gas bombs. When thrown, the bombs would release a smoky gas into the room which could knock someone out for several hours. Gunther himself was immune to it so he could use them safely. With the gas bombs in his large pockets, Gunther went off looking for the other three.

When he came to the restroom, he thought he heard a noise coming from inside. He moved closer to listen. Yes, they were there!

"Shit, I think he heard us." Joey said, "I think he's outside."

"Damn." Chandler said. "I'll try to negotiate with him, try and get him not to kill you guys."

"No don't be stupid, he'll kill you!" Monica tried to protest.

"Keep back." Chandler said. They stood behind the door as Chandler opened it.

"And what, expletive very much included here, fuck do you want?" He asked Gunther.

"You know." He said. He reached into his pocket for a gas bomb. "Where are they?"

"Not here."

"I'm not stupid. I heard them. This bomb will knock all of you out for a couple of hours. If I use it however, there's no guarantee you'll wake up again so tell me where the hell they are!"

"No!" Chandler slammed the door. "Shit. Now he has some special bomb thing."

Gunther kept trying to open the door. Eventually, he managed to open it enough to throw a single gas bomb in.

"Cover your mouth and nose and _get down_." Chandler told the other two.

Whilst he was busy trying to find Chandler, Monica and Joey, Gunther had completely forgotten about the other three. _Why had he decided to take 4 people from the same friendship group? That was always more complicated_. Phoebe had managed to rescue the laser from the cupboard and Ross grabbed a chair leg. Then they silently headed over to where Gunther was.

"What's that?" Rachel asked as she noticed Gunther throwing something into the restroom.

"I don't know. Can't be good though." Ross whispered. When they were by the counter, Phoebe aimed the laser and fired. It had no affect but Gunther had realised where they were. He turned and started to walk towards them with an evil grin on his face.

"What have you done to them?" Ross asked

"Nothing. Not yet anyway." Gunther replied, getting another gas bomb ready.

Ross, seeing this, suddenly realised what he had to do. He raised the chair leg and ran at Gunther bringing the leg down hard on his head. Gunther fell down but Ross kept on hitting him. The girls ran past.

"Help me." Ross said, "We should tie him up and lock him somewhere."

"Excuse me while I get my rope then." Rachel laughed.

"Got it!" Phoebe said, pulling some rope out of her bag which was still on the couch.

"Nice one." Ross said starting to tie Gunther up. When he had finished they locked him in the storage cupboard and went to find the others.

_Hope you enjoyed that chapter, as I said, I don't really know when I'll be able to update again but hopefully soon. Please review I guess…_


	4. And when it's over

_Author's note_

_Hi again. School's getting (a bit) better (I actually understand physics this year! Woop) but both of my lit teachers are bitches but yeah, we'll see how it goes. I just got Bob Dylan's new album and oh my God it is awesome, seriously. I've had it on repeat for like 2 hours now._

_Anyway, sad to say I still don't own Friends. Someday though…_

**And when it's over**

"What's going on?" Joey asked Chandler who was crouched by the door.

"I don't know. It seems quiet." Chandler opened the door slightly and after seeing the coast was clear, opened it fully. He signalled for the other two to follow him out.

"Hey guys." Ross said, seeing them come out of the restroom. "You all ok?"

"Yeah." Chandler said, "He threw some gas bomb in there but I think we're ok."

Monica and Joey sat down on the couch and soon, the others soon joined them.

"So, we're ok then?" Rachel asked

"I guess." Joey replied.

"Urm, guys. In case you hadn't noticed, we're in a flying coffee house heading towards some random planet!" Ross said, slightly worried.

"Well, how do we steer this thing?" Chandler asked, going over to have a look at the controls. "I think this one is down." He pulled at one lever and soon they felt themselves flying downwards. Chandler quickly levelled out the ship and then tried out the other lever.

"Well that one's left or right." He said. "But how would you land it?"

"More to the point," Ross joined in "Where the hell are we?"

"I have to idea. The Atlantic maybe. But hundreds of miles above it." Phoebe suggested, looking out of the window.

"Ok." Chandler said, struggling to turn it around but eventually he managed to. Then he started to gradually lowering the coffee house.

"Not yet, not too low anyway." Monica said. "I mean, how many people are used to seeing a flying coffee house?"

"Good point, we'll stay at this height for now."

"Where's Gunther?" Joey asked, looking around suspiciously.

"In the cupboard." Rachel pointed over to the cupboard which now had several chairs in front of it.

"And we got his laser." Phoebe said, showing it to them.

"Nice one." Chandler said. They flew for the next few minutes in silence.

Soon, they were relatively close to New York, not surprising seen as they were going about 900 miles per hour.

"Ok, let's try and land this. " Chandler said "Never noticed how many buildings there were here before." But somehow, he managed to navigate the maze of buildings and land in more or less the place they had taken off from.

"Do you think anyone noticed?" Asked Joey

"I'm guessing Gunther will have done something to unsure they forget about it." Ross said.

"Hey, what will we do about Gunther?" Monica asked. As if he had heard her, there was banging coming from inside the cupboard. Chandler picked up the laser and looked at the rest of the gang.

"Do it. It's for the best." Monica said, the rest agreed.

"Ok." Chandler walked over to the cupboard with the gang behind him.

"I've got the door." Ross said. He flung the door open and Chandler fired the laser repeatedly. When he stopped, they saw Gunther lying on a pile of chairs.

"I guess I got him."

"Yeah. Yeah you did." Rachel agreed.

"So, do we tell people or…what?" Phoebe asked.

"Don't tell." Ross said. "I think it'll be best if we don't say anything. In theory, no one else should have noticed anything. As for Gunther, don't say anything either. They'll find him soon enough."

"Ok." The gang agreed and after shutting the cupboard door they headed out into the busy hustle of New York.

Back to normality.

_Foot note_

_Well, hope you enjoyed that chapter and indeed the whole story, thank you for all the reviews by the way :) P.s. is it just me or is 'oscillating' a very funny word? xx_


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